Phildickian Gnosticism

“I write about people I love, and put them into a fictional world spun out of my own mind, not the world we actually have, because the world we actually have does not meet my standards. In my writing I even question the universe; I wonder out loud if it is real, and I wonder out loud if all of us are real.”

I saw the door open. A gentle push. The light flittered incessantly but I could see him. Reclined on his chair, with his eyes wide open. Something was amiss. I sensed it.

"Are you alright, Mr. Dick? ", I enquired.

He lay still.

"Mr. Dick......".

"Huh...uh...err...nothing, nothing at all ", he replied.

"But something's wrong with you. I have a feeling ".

"Well, its actually...actually...."

He halts and gives me a queer look. I stand there trying to read his thoughts.

"I...I am having strange visions. Things which I shouldn't be seeing. Things unknown..."

Maybe it was the effect of the prolonged medication that he was undergoing. But I was not quite sure.

"What is it that you see? "

"Vesicle Pisces ".

Vesicle Pisces? I hadn't heard that before for sure. What could that be? I pondered frantically.

"I experienced an invasion of my mind...by a transcendentally rational mind, as if I had been insane all my life and suddenly...suddenly I have become sane now ".

"I see Jesus. The ancient Rome. Thomas. Does all this make any sense to you. Tell me...does this have any religious significance? "

I didn't have an answer. I shook my head in dissent.

"I don't seem to be myself. I...I feel like I'm somebody else. But who? Who can I be...? "

He rambled on. His face swept with undulating emotions of anger & exhilaration. This was strange. For a moment, I thought I knew him. The other moment, I didn't. I stood there, fixated on him.

"VALIS. GOD. I see it. I see it now."

He turned to me and said, "Leave me alone ".

I couldn't do much. I had to leave. As I inched towards the door, I glanced back at him. I wondered what had befallen this great writer. The greatest of all times. The man who seamlessly bridged the gap between alternate history and science fiction in his writings. The man who brought forth the ideas of shifting universes and made complete sense out of surreal fantasies. The same literary virtuoso was now not in touch with reality. How pitiable. The effect of drugs and intermittent bouts of schizophrenia had taken its toll on him. However the fact remained. His paranoiac self was a genius. A genius whom the world will remember for eons. Only time will tell.

[During the period of February and March of 1974, Philip K. Dick encountered a series of visions, which he referred to as "two-three-seventy-four" (2-3-74). He described the initial visions as laser beams and geometric patterns, and, occasionally, brief pictures of Jesus and of ancient Rome. As the visions increased in length and frequency, Dick claimed he began to live a double life, one as himself, "Philip K. Dick", and one as "Thomas", a Christian persecuted by Romans in the 1st century A.D. Despite his history of drug use and elevated stroke risk, Dick began seeking other rationalist and religious explanations for these experiences. He referred to the "transcendentally rational mind" as "Zebra", "God" and, most often, "VALIS". Dick wrote about the experiences in the semi-autobiographical novels Valis and Radio Free Albemuth.

Resorting to such an overt dramatization comes easy when one reels under the profound effect of his writings. I call it the 'PKD Syndrome'. Try running through his literary works and you shall know better.]